It Girl Q+A

What if I don’t have any friends? My best friend stopped talking to me after she got a boyfriend?

Liz says she doesn’t have any friends either, and she’s living her best life because she’s her own best friend. 

A lot of us are scared to be alone, and so invite all kinds of people into our company just to avoid being alone. Even ones that are toxic for us. 

This can easily and very quickly become dangerous, which is why before you are friends with anyone, you need to be your own friend first. By learning to enjoy your own company, it will be that much easier for you are able to choose distance over disrespect. 

Many of us are uncomfortable being alone because we don’t even know who we are and what we like. I found this to be very common for those who had to grow up prioritizing everyone else’s need above their own. As a result, you never took the time to understand yourself and explore your own interests. Your lack of connection with yourself pushes you to find that elsewhere.

Learn to enjoy your own company, so that the idea of being alone is better than being in bad company.

Want to submit something for advice? Fill this form here. 

It Girl Lesson

Eldest Daughter Syndrome is so real.

For those who received comments like “you’re so mature for your age” in their childhood, we often see that it’s usually with kids who never really had the chance to be kids.

This is especially true for many eldest children, who had to take on the caregiver role in home while parents were busy working. Naturally, you become hyper independent and often assume the role of being the caregiver in many friendships and even romantic relationships as well.

It took a lot of strength for you to become an adult, and assuming responsibility that wasn’t necessarily yours. But understand that your value extends beyond behind a caretaker for younger siblings and being the problem solver for your parents. 

Give yourself permission to pursue your dreams, desires, and well being. From one eldest daughter to another, I understand how tired you must feel from shouldering all the responsibility while it seemed like everyone else just got to be kids,

Shifting your focus onto yourself isn’t neglecting your family; it’s ensuring that you don’t neglect your own needs. You deserve to be happy too.

It Girl Essentials

As someone who had always prioritized my family’s needs over mine, which shaped me into a people pleaser for a good part of my life, I found books that helped me understand the need to prioritize my own needs to be so incredibly helpful.

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck provided just that- encouragement to stop giving a f*ck on what society pressures you to be like, what your family and friends think of you, and even the limiting beliefs you put on yourself.

I hope this book can encourage you to start living a better life for yourself, like it did for me.

It Girl Playbook Updates

The Playbook Mini is out! It’s a compiled work of our beloved and most popular series: It Girl Lessons from It Girls.

Pay what you want, so grab a copy now! 

I put a lot of work into it, so I’d really appreciate a review if you enjoy it. It’ll be super helpful for a bigger project I’m working on for you.

xoxo,

It Girl Playbook 💋